By Darlene Haddad
Why does emotional pain sometimes hurt more than physical pain? Is there such a thing such as accumulated or stored emotional pain living inside you? Yes, there is! As a child, you grew up having to deal with painful life experiences that you cannot even remember anymore. Painful experiences and memories of childhood that you faced were somehow blocked by your memory, too hard to remember.
Yet your tender body and mind were scarred by the experience and these experiences entered us and were somewhere stored inside of us, even if they are now forgotten. Within each of our cells, we absorbed the emotional pain, and it got stored inside of us as a form of energy. As we grew older, we didn’t quite know how to explain these feelings or to whom we should explain them to and so we continued on the path of life. Our personalities continued to develop and be molded by all of our life experiences. By the time you entered into adulthood, you have carried around so many experiences that you cannot even explain them anymore, but the ones that hurt the most have been stored in all different areas of your body. Most of these old emotions are useless but they still control our actions throughout our adulthood and if we don’t take care of them, they can ruin our lives.
Emotions have been described as energy in motion, hence e-motion. Emotions are a very complex thing. Just like the cells in our bodies are composed of many things, such as water and organic molecules, our emotions are created from things such as situations, circumstances, other people, and our own impressions of the world. If people understood this, then they could appreciate the depth of their feelings. Much of what we experience is a form of energy that has to be processed by the body. Your e-motions serve an important purpose. One way to think of your emotions is as a navigational system or compass. When you are lost, you would hold your compass flatly in your hand and turn your body around so that you can get the needle to point north. If your needle was pointing south, then you would walk in the opposite direction to go north. Your emotions act the same way, they navigate you. They give your brain a signal or feeling that something may be right or wrong, and can often help in difficult situations. They can tell you which way to go, and they may even save your life.
Furthermore, emotions don’t just manifest in the body as non-physical entities, but also as physical side effects. Have you ever said sat down and said, ‘Oh, I had a terrible day, and now I have a headache.’ Or, ‘My shoulders are killing because I have been under so much stress’? Well, it’s no co-incidence that certain emotions affect the body physically in different ways. It has been studied and examined by medical professions and documented worldwide that “Stress is the silent killer!” This is so true in so many ways. Stress doesn’t have to be fatal until it kills you. Stress can slowly kill you by taking away so many things, bit by bit, as if it was a slow death. Stress destroys you in ways that are irreversible (i.e., high blood pressure, stroke, diabetes, anger issues, relationship issues, migraines etc.). Our bodies release chemicals as well in times of stress and depression or in times of great joy that can literally create a new environment within the body that is either good for you or bad for you. So for instance, when you are happy, you brain releases serotonin, dopamine or oxytocin and you will be filled with positive reactions. Conversely, when you are stressed, your body releases cortisol, which in effect will turn the body into a heavily charged machine ready for fighting or fleeing a difficult situation.
As psychologists specializing in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, we look at people’s thoughts, believing it is the thoughts about a situation that lead to stress, depression or anxiety and not the difficult situation itself. It is all about changing your thinking and releasing those negative emotions that are stopping you from being the amazing person you were meant to be. Start today with these 10 simple suggestions;
- Sing every day for 5 minutes out loud!
- Replace, “I can’t,” with “I can!”
- Stop and help someone randomly in any way.
- No one is perfect, believe it and accept it.
- Say good bye to negative people.
- If you’re not smiling enough, start doing it and trick your brain.
- Jump up and down saying I am great 20 times!
- Meditate and send your worries away to a nice place.
- Say good things about life.
- Eat fresh fruit, imagining your body filled with happy fuel.
Darlene is a psychologist in Kuwait with a specialty in relationship issues, guided self-discovery, self-esteem issues, depression & anxiety. Contact her on 5078 0113 or [email protected], follow her on instagram @Darlene_Psychology.