By the time you are reading this, it is very likely that we will be very close to, or already into the finals of the 2014 FIFA World Cup. The 32 teams from around the world will have gathered for an attempt at the greatest victory in worldwide football, though some admittedly have more chance than others. Sixty-four years after it first hosted a FIFA World Cup, Brazil will once again stage the event. With a record five world titles to its name and the distinction of being the only country to have played in all 19 previous editions of the tournament, Brazil is counting down the days until the participating nations and their fans arrive on its shores. In honor of these matches, here they are: your Love/Hate occurrences for the World Cup.
#5 The Incessant repeat of official songs – The official World Cup song is nice enough as an idea. And generally, the multicultural approach and (supposed) spotlight on the home country is a welcomed one, but that can only last about the first ten times you hear the official song. The problem is that you are destined to hear it at least a thousand more times before the games are over. This is especially bad in a year when the song happens to be a bad one (I’m thinking of you Daryll Hall!). Plus there are about 10 different versions of the official songs, plus all the unofficial versions; it can really be a bit much (for more information on the best songs of FIFA history, see our article on the World Cup songs in this month’s issue).
#4 Other Football fans – Have you seen football fans lately? They are loud! They are rambunctious!! They are troublemakers! They are…hooligans! And that’s just my grandmother. Wait until you see the people less hampered by old age and a 6pm curfew. There is really no telling which way the crowd is going to go at any minute, and anger+frustration over your team’s loss = disaster à la mode (as in fight mode). So if you are going to the games, cheer like crazy, stay safe, and watch out for my grandmother!
#3 Astronomical prices – We get it: hot dogs have to cost about 20 US dollars once they cross the stadium threshold. Thank you, but no. I will take the parking lot-sold mystery street meat for 0.50 centavos amigo!
#2 Fair-weather fans blocking your TV – So you couldn’t afford the thousand Dinar trip to Brazil and back? At least you can sit at your home/office/favorite gathering spots amongst friends and frien-emies both! You’ve waited four long years for your team to get another crack at the World Cup title and…at the last minute some guy who doesn’t even like football puts his huge cranium right between you and the screen…UGH!
#1 Your home country gets knocked out in an early round and you are forced to spend the rest of the month with your head hung in shame – Truth be told, there is nothing as good as the feeling of your team doing well in the World Cup, but most of us understand our chances heading in. So for us realists out here, we revert to a mentality of “I know we cannot win, but just don’t get knocked out too early”. This request seems understandable enough. You have the next four years of razzing on the line here. You just need a little something to be proud of—is that too much to ask? Beyond just that though, there is nothing worse during an entire month’s worth of games than seeing your countries’ chances of winning go down before they even get going; love the games, hate this part. Best of luck to you all…and my team most of all!
Love/Hate is your monthly guide to the arguing voices in our collective heads! No it’s not. Yes it is! No its not. Yes it is…