We don’t know about you but we’re feeling both apprehensive and excited about being in our office again. We loved working from home and would love to do it forever but spending time in our bazaarwaniya with our fellow bazaarites is something we sorely miss. Everyone and their brother has guidelines on office/new life etiquette and hygiene but they’ve missed some of the most important things that need dealing with. So we’re stepping in, you’re welcome.
Forget about your dry-clean only clothes
We don’t know about you, but we’ve been laundering everything at the highest temperature on our washing machines and adding bleach, just to be extra safe. Are we paranoid? Probably, but it is one less thing to worry about.
The canvas bag is the new laptop bag
We know you have a fancy designer handbag or laptop backpack, but can you wash it? Or give it a wipe with Clorox? We didn’t think so. Our reusable canvas totes are on rotation now so we can keep them nice and clean.
Up please
If you need to take an elevator then you need to have a game plan. Hold your breath. Keep your face away from everyone else and for the love of God do not touch the buttons. Even before COVID-19 we were reluctant to touch elevator buttons. We’re using chopsticks at the moment. They’re nice and long so you can press without even having to go near the panel.
Give your face a break
You’re going to be wearing a mask anyway, so you can skip your 17-step beauty routine in the morning. Foundation underneath three layers of mask fabric all day is just begging for a major breakout. It also means you have no excuse for being late.
The new tan lines
Now that we will be going out everyday and summer is in full swing, we’re actually worried about this. If you used to worry about your sunglasses giving you ugly tan lines, your worst fears have been replaced because of mask tan lines. We did some googling. It is not pretty. We might be investing in some tinted face shields instead of masks.
Brush your teeth
Your teeth might be behind a mask and a shield, and we might be standing two meters away. But please still brush your teeth. It is gross when you don’t.
Fake coughing
Fake coughing is just bad form right now. Unless you are trying to give everyone an aneurysm or trying to get an extra day off. And if you do need to cough, do it in your elbow.
Feeling hot hot hot
We do know that some workplaces will be measuring your temperature at the door. Please, be a responsible adult and call in sick if you have a fever. Please be a responsible adult and don’t pretend to be sick when you are not.
Sanitize all the surfaces
The people in charge at your workplace are required to make sure that everything is sanitized properly. However, we suggest you stock up on your own wipes and sanitizer so you can regularly wipe your desk, office phone, door handles, etc.
Don’t touch our stuff
Do we sound like angry teenagers? Well, we don’t care and we mean it. We already hated it when you touched our favorite mug. So, don’t touch anyone else’s keyboard, phone, desk, chair, etc.
The little boys and girls rooms
Be a big kid and just hold it in if you can, because even on a good day we never want to think about sharing bathrooms with other people. On a day when there’s a pandemic going on we absolutely refuse to deal with this. We also know it’s almost impossible to actually hold it in all day, so if you must use the restroom, do sanitize before and after!
Desk snacks only
Kiss visiting your office kitchenette goodbye for a while. Unless you are ok touching the surfaces that everyone else is. Pack your own to go lunch and eat it at your desk or order in.
Say no to meetings
After months of working from home, everyone has realized how useless meetings are. So there is absolutely no point in resurrecting them now, just because we are all in the office. Use email instead, or Zoom.
We think we’ve covered it all, if you think we missed something let us know by DMing us on Instagram @bazaargram. Photo by Erik Mclean on Unsplash.
